Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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