don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
ttyl tear gas
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
