We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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