hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
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You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
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He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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