two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
it glows. i had to have it.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Boobs are out for the taking
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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