whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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