She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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