Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
