You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Is Oprah even human
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
