HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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