Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
