Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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