is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
