Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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