i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
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