That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
