so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
