I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize