we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives