Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
