i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
