Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
i've created a new STD.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
