I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Randomize
