He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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