I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
