Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
