We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize