East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Randomize
