No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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