is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
