i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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