Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
