I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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