why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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