I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
