He felt like a one man threesome
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
