Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
