he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
