is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
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