Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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