There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
