I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Randomize
