And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
