In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
