his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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