i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Actions speak louder than pants.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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