maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
