just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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