I'm jealous of your bromance
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Enjoy the penises
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
