cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
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